I like the plot, but I think your dialogue really makes the fic for me. I adore how they speak to each other in this very direct, offhand, often rude manner, but there's a tenderness underlying even their worst insults. It comes across as if they've developed their own personal shorthand code, but the shooting scrambled it somehow because they spend so much of the fic misunderstanding each other.

My favourite line for some reason was: "More hair than sense." I think it's because it sounds very canon-Bodie, and it carries such an evocative image, and it appears at a very touching moment in the story.

Anyway, great fic - really enjoyed it!