I really enjoyed that! All the stuff at the zoo was delightful. I can totally see Bodie getting into the spirit of things and thinking of their outing as a date. In a way, their day out is weirdly romantic. After all, the zoo is where Ray first let on how he felt about Bodie. It's almost like their "special place."
But what also really pulled me in was what kicked things off--Doyle getting hit with the trank. Just think about it (which I'm sure you did...seeing as you wrote it!) If Ray hadn't gotten loopy, he wouldn't have held Bodie back. Bodie would have left him there, propped against the wall, and torn off after the baddie, which means no one would have been there to realize Ray suddenly couldn't breathe. Maybe this comes from reading too many Sentinel Too, Part I fics, but I =LOVE= the image of Bodie keeping Ray alive by breathing for him. It's wonderfully intimate.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2007-02-24 08:41 am (UTC)But what also really pulled me in was what kicked things off--Doyle getting hit with the trank. Just think about it (which I'm sure you did...seeing as you wrote it!) If Ray hadn't gotten loopy, he wouldn't have held Bodie back. Bodie would have left him there, propped against the wall, and torn off after the baddie, which means no one would have been there to realize Ray suddenly couldn't breathe. Maybe this comes from reading too many Sentinel Too, Part I fics, but I =LOVE= the image of Bodie keeping Ray alive by breathing for him. It's wonderfully intimate.
Nice job!