ext_112784: (Default)
[identity profile] angel-ci5.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] discoveredinalj
This latest challenge is such a fantastic idea and I wanted to pay tribute somehow, so wrote this little fic.
Eternal thanks to [livejournal.com profile] byslantedlight for the rapid beta.




He tried to push himself flatter to the ground. He didn't feel the freezing cold mud that had seeped through his clothes to his skin, all he felt was the fear. The volley of bullets was close, too close, but it was the constant roar of the big guns he couldn't bear, the continuous bombardment that never seemed to stop. He tried to think, but it was so hard when his head was filled with the constant salvos and the yelling of men. He lowered his head a fraction more, trying to ignore the dirt in his mouth and in his nose.

Think, think! How long had he been doing this, how many times? Days had become months, even years, this should have got easier, following orders each time should have got easier. But it had got more and more difficult, the fear building up inside him each time, as fewer and fewer of them returned - and now he was completely paralysed by it. He knew he should move, but he just couldn't, and anyway where would he go? He was in hell, there was no escape. He closed his eyes tightly, tried to ignore the screams in his head.

Please God, please...Please make it stop, please, if you're there, please help me...

A crushing pressure on his wrist made him snap open his eyes. There, just a few inches from his own was a mud splattered face and a pair of pale green eyes peering at him from under the brim of a helmet. The mouth was moving, in an extremely animated fashion, and over the roar in his ears Bodie tried to focus, on the face and the green eyes and the mouth.

"Come on, we've got to move, OK? Follow me! I'm with you, come on, we've got to go!" the man was shouting to be heard over the noises of war that surrounded them. Bodie glanced down at his wrist and saw a filthy hand gripping it tightly, pulling at it firmly.

"Come on! Now! Follow me, I won't let you go!" the man was still shouting at him and his wrist was yanked ever more urgently. Bodie felt the fear recede a tiny bit, the paralysis which had bound his body loosened slightly. He realised he was still clutching his rifle in his other hand. He tried to wriggle slightly and felt the squelch of the mud that blanketed the front of his body. Now the cold and the wet hit him, he could feel it like ice against his skin.

Another explosion shook the ground. The other man was still looking at him anxiously; Bodie nodded and tried his voice, "OK, let's go".

The other soldier gestured with his rifle slightly behind and to Bodie's left, and together they struggled around and crawled as quickly as the mire and their lungs would allow them, shoulders, hips and legs bumping together as they moved, until suddenly Bodie could see that just up ahead through the mist the ground dropped away. Just a few seconds more and they'd make it.

Keep moving, keep moving.

Struggling the last couple of feet, which seemed more like a swamp than ever, Bodie felt the grip on his wrist once more and then he was yanked bodily over the edge. They both tumbled the short distance and landed with a wet thud at the bottom of the trench.

They sat in a heap for a moment, panting for breath, hearts racing.

"All right?" the man with green eyes asked him with concern.

Bodie nodded and glanced at the ground, "Thank you" he said quietly.

He felt cold wet fingers lift his chin so he had to meet the other man's gaze. He was smiling now, a big, warm smile that transformed his face, "I'm Doyle", he said, and Bodie smiled back as the fear retreated into the shadows.

The End



Title: The Light
Author: angelci5
Gen/Slash: Pre-slash
Archive at ProsLib/Circuit: If you like
Disclaimer: Not mine
Notes: Written for the Discovered in Remembrance Challenge

Date: 2008-11-02 12:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shooting2kill.livejournal.com
Oh! Oh! I'm all overcome...this was such a wonderful idea and beautifully executed - I loved the sentiments behind it: comrades in arms and love (or they will be, soon).

even years, this should have got easier, following orders each time should have got easier. But it had got more and more difficult

And even though I know it wasn't about ci5 I thought this was an interesting observation and something which isn't explored enough in the context of ci5.

Thank you for this.

Date: 2008-11-02 01:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sc-fossil.livejournal.com
Very nicely written. Bodie's fear was palpable, and having Doyle be the one to lead him to safety worked for me even though they were in other places. Thanks.

Date: 2008-11-02 01:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] biani.livejournal.com
Loved this! I wouldn´t mind seeing this part in a longer story, thank you!

Date: 2008-11-02 01:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shooting2kill.livejournal.com
I agree - I'd love to see a longer story from this!

Date: 2008-11-03 09:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shooting2kill.livejournal.com
I'm really pleased you used that icon and I think I'd forgotten that I even had it! (Are you sure it was me?)

Date: 2008-11-03 10:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shooting2kill.livejournal.com
Oh, yes! I've just remembered the light streaming from the window on his side! Hmmm....I think there's a story there you know...

Date: 2008-11-02 02:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] solosundance.livejournal.com
oh my gosh what a place and time for them to meet ... very powerful idea and kind of perfect for them. Thank you.

Date: 2008-11-02 04:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mistry89.livejournal.com
The fan on my computer is noisy, not sure if that contributed to the background sound, but I'm sure I heard the explosions and shouting. Very appropriate - brothers in arms across the years.
Thank you.

Date: 2008-11-02 04:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] byslantedlight.livejournal.com
You posted - hurrah! You know I loved it, but I shall say so again - this is a brilliant first fic for the challenge, thank you!

Date: 2008-11-02 07:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] callistosh65.livejournal.com
What a glorious start to the challenge! I heard every gunshot, every squelch of mud, felt Bodie's fear right along with him.. the atmosphere was terrific. I love the image of Doyle's filthy hand latching on to Bodie's wrist. Thank you so much for this.

Date: 2008-11-02 07:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msmoat.livejournal.com
Oh, that's nice. Okay, not nice to put them in trench warfare, but...um...nice in other ways. *g* They would get through to each other, wouldn't they? Strangers or not. Thank you!

Date: 2008-11-02 10:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] firlefanzine.livejournal.com
Giving the unknown soldiers two faces...
Very good!

Date: 2008-11-02 10:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] saintvic.livejournal.com
This is an interesting idea and I really like the last line in particular.
Edited Date: 2008-11-02 10:02 pm (UTC)

Date: 2008-11-03 10:28 pm (UTC)
ext_9226: (pros Don4)
From: [identity profile] snailbones.livejournal.com


I read this yesterday, and I was so moved by it I couldn't think of anything coherent to say... and a day later I'm still blithering *g*

I love the idea of them fighting together in another time and place, and you've created the atmosphere beautifully.

Fabulous, thank you.

Date: 2008-11-09 02:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rochvelleth.livejournal.com
I love the tension in this - very nicely done. And they're just meant to be together, aren't they? *g*

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