Prosfic - Never The Words They Say

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Well, happy Boxing Day - I hope everyone's full of goodness and glee after yesterday, and enjoying themselves still. Here's another story from me, should sorting out all that wrapping paper start to pall *g*

Never The Words They Say


Title: Never The Words They Say
Author: Slantedlight
Slash or Gen: Slash
Archive at ProsLib/Circuit/Hatstand: Certainly, if wanted!
Disclaimer: Bodie, Doyle and the CI5 universe do not belong to me, and I certainly don't make any money out of them. I'm just borrowing them to play with over the long cold winter...

Comments

[elizabethoshea.livejournal.com]

Am I first? Oh good *g*. Well, that was a lovely long read and a lovely story (although I wanted them to stay - I know it was impossible really, but still...). And it's left me longing for snow even more than I was before *g*. I really enjoyed the leisurely unfolding of the relationship and the feeling of a time out of time despite the sense of a hovering threat behind the peace. I loved the idea of the village surveillance network knowing exactly what they were up to all the time they thought they were being so careful, too *g*.

My favourite line: "It never occurred to either of them to split up." Of course not!

Thank you so much for this. What on earth are we going to do when we don't have a new story or picture or whatever to wake up to every morning? Maybe there should be a year-round challenge...

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Well, any time you fancy snow just pop on up - it's been almost constant (though light) for the last four days... Just when I have a car too!

So glad you liked the fic! I have to admit that the village network is practically from personal experience (Manchester had its advantages, it turns out!) - my Auntie Viv was in their somewhere... *g*

Maybe there should be a year-round challenge...
Ah, now, see - we'd need willing authors and artists for that one, so, um..? (But I know, isn't it brilliant?!)

[rosie55.livejournal.com]

Loved it! It makes so much more sense that the lads would go off somewhere to think out their situation, after Cowley's betrayal, rather than meekly falling back in line.
Village life, so true to life, wonderful descriptions of snow and a mention for the slanted lights! Really laughed about the bed being "borrowed" and then returned, along with all the other stuff. elizabethoshea is exactly right about the sense of timelessness and the sense of danger, and George turning up and finding his boys being backed up by the locals!
A lovely thoughtful, thought-provoking story and one I shall enjoy re-reading - thank you very much! Taking you well up among the great Pros writers, I reckon.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Well, there's a part of me can see that they might just take it on the chin, a bit - they did agree to the Operation Susie after all, and they knew what that meant, but...

So glad you liked the village - and of course everyone loves our lads, right?! I'm ever so glad you enjoyed it, and thank you for your very kind words (I mean, tish and pshaw, but how lovely to read them!)*g*

[callistosh65.livejournal.com]

Okay, will write in more coherent detail later when I have more time, but just when I thought this Pros fic challenge could not get any better, you go and write one of the best I've ever read. Stunning.

[callistosh65.livejournal.com]

Okay, I'm back, with time and coherency on my hands.*g*

I enjoyed so much about this, I scarcely know where to start. The set up is absolutely perfect - there is something about the two of them locked away in isolation, and here, in a Scottish croft, that speaks to my heart. (I love HG'S Strange Days Indeed for much the same reason).You set up a wonderful sense of..fragility..against the backdrop of their world gone, and CI5 against them. I loved the sense of a thaw you give to both of them: As they play cards in front of a fire, learn about each other's grans, take pleasure in a snowfall, we get a wonderful picture of them drifting ever closer together, away from the blood and bullets. Just beautiful.

I loved that it was Scotland - most of my extended clan is there and I miss them like crazy at this time of year, so I enjoyed the canvas of colourful village extras - and, man, I could smell the peat!

You are a phenomenally talented writer, and, hand on my heart, this is now in my top five fics. Below are just some random highlights that I couldn't help but pick out.

Thank you for this. I loved it. Truly, madly, deeply. *g*


The metallic tang of her blood sliced the air between them, a scream without sound.

“Actually mate, I think you’ll find that’s peat.” His voice was steady, and Bodie loved him for it.
“Pete? Who the hell’s..?”
“Peat fuel , you dumb crud. You burn it.”
“Oh,” Bodie surveyed the mud with a better appreciation. “You drink whisky by it an’ all, don’t you?”

Doyle was nothing but a long line in his sleeping bag.


Deep, deep undercover, as just themselves. Maybe Bodie really would find them a Buddha statue.

You can have him to here, after that he’s just Doyle, just your partner.

[msmoat.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was terrific! I loved the sense of place--you captured that very well--and yes, the timelessness of it. The villagers were great, very real and not at all the usual sort of ciphers that original characters often are in fan fiction. I liked the confrontation with Cowley very much, and the people surrounding them in the pub. *g* And then, of course there was the whole relationship arc! That was wonderful--slow and real, with a sense of both inevitability and magic. I loved the shaving scene! ;-)

If I had to pick a line, it would be the same one elizabethoshea chose. Beautiful!

All in all: terrific, well done, and a wonderful present for Boxing Day. Thank you!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

(Is it bad to admit that I quite liked the shaving scene as well? I mean, Doyle should shave Bodie so much more often! *g*)

I'm so glad you liked it, thank you for saying so!

[brenk.livejournal.com]

I love this. It's the sort of good, meaty read that makes me happy because it's got it *all* - characterisation, plot, and lovely flowing writing - and of course the absolutely brilliant OCs who don't steal the show but add to the whole thing.

Could go on for ever but it's still all hell let loose here and I wanna sneak off and read your other one :)

But thanks - fantastic read.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hee - well thank you! Hope you like the other one too - and that you're enjoying a nice quiet time by now! *g*

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

Another winner! I just love this story and I’m so pleased you’ve given us a second treat.(And sorry, can’t help but want to write a lot but tell me if it’s too much and I’ll delete some).

So, why *do* I love it? Well, where do I start? How long is a piece of string? From the ominous, stop-me-in-my-tracks, first sentence, Cowley betrayed us, I was hooked and, as always, your wonderful writing managed to keep me hooked, questioning and wondering all the way through. I loved the atmosphere you created: at the beginning one of impending doom, almost hopelessness; then one which gave way to (or ran parallel with) a cosy, intimate kind of feeling, one which reflected what was happening between them in their relationship.

I loved the story’s setting: the croft and the beautiful silent world of snow which seemed to represent some sort of sanctity for them - Bodie and Doyle, alone in the wilderness, pitted against the world and on the run. And yet, despite this threat hanging over them, there is a physical absence of violence which is sweet, almost a relief and something which they desperately need. And I loved the gentleness of the story and, at times it’s slow, rambling nature as they settle into their newly discovered haven – a haven I envied them for having as I too wanted to share their wonderful world. And the peace they’re slowly finding with each other, with their new life in the croft and with life in general, this peace is in stark contrast to the life they’ve led, the people they’ve met and the danger they’re *still* in and which provides a permanent, but unseen, backcloth to their daily lives. So, there seem to be two things going on here: the reader (along with B & D) is lulled into a kind of phoney war type of peace, but every now and then they’re reminded this peace is transitory and it makes me, the reader, feel very drawn into the story, sad for them and constantly fearful of their future (star-crossed lovers).

I admired your attention to detail – the beer settling well, 'neeps and tatties', a cousin called Moira (I’ve got one!) etc

For me, beautiful, memorable stories are full of ‘golden’ moments and this is one of mine:

Doyle seemed to suddenly realise that he was starting to shiver, and collapsed back onto the pillow, pulling the blankets up to his chin and scrabbling to make sure they were tucked all down his side. His movements let in tiny puffs of the cold he was trying to keep out, stirred up the warm, Doyle-scented air that Bodie had been keeping trapped all around his own body, and brought them just that little bit closer together. Did Doyle know that they were nearly touching, Bodie wondered, that he could feel the rise and fall of Doyle's breath as though it was his own? If he moved his head just a fraction, tucked himself just a little bit further down in bed, he would be resting, ever so barely, against Doyle's shoulder again… And in the magic of the morning, he did, and Doyle was still, and quiet, and Bodie's own breath steadied again, and he fell asleep.

And the shaving scene – do it for me - simple words, yet so erotic and I was hoping against hope that Doyle *would* end up doing it for Bodie. Perfect.

And I loved this image:

Bodie'd never put a hand on his waist before, and somehow the thought was unbelievably arousing.

Too true! Absolutely love this line, too:

and Bodie began, but it had always been like that, Bodie his phantom-self no matter how far apart they were

And the two paragraphs in particular which began with If Bodie had ever been happy before he couldn't remember, well, they’re just so perfect and beautifully written they made me want to cry.

Beautiful! Thanks, so much Slanted.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

I am absolutely gobsmacked and shamed by everything you've said here! You have such a lovely way of describing what you see in a fic, and it makes me think that I must try harder when giving feedback myself, because it's so lovely to read! And no, not too much at all, because it's so good to see what other people have seen in your fic... And oh yes, our gorgeous star-crossed lovers! Blood and fear and each other. Thank you so much for this, it's made me so happy to read it!

[myrebelcat.livejournal.com]

This made me so happy!

I loved all the details, the angst, the little bits of humour, and there was even a nice bit of hurt/comfort there at the end!

I really fell in love with that village as well, and I wish they could have stayed even though I know it's impossible. But they'll have to go back to visit, right?

And the absolute best part for me was when the village folks stood up to Cowley. "He doesn't look like an artist." Hee! And Cowley trying to play along with Ray's cover. "We want you back in the department."

It makes me wonder how much the villagers will have guessed about who they really are. I do hope we'll get to visit this universe again!

Thank you so much!

[msmoat.livejournal.com]

Okay, I don't know the etiquette about butting in to other people's posts, but this that you said: I do hope we'll get to visit this universe again! Really struck me. Yes! Let's visit again--after all, Doyle still owns the crofthouse, right? Surely they'll need another break? Surely slantedlight can be tempted/bribed/blackmailed...? *g* ::looks around:: Where's empty_mirrors, she'll know how to do the tempting/bribing/blackmailing most effectively! ;-)

[probodie.livejournal.com]

Well, this challenge just keeps getting better and better. There is so much I LOVE about it, I cant even mention it (what, a wuss, me? Damn right! lol). It's all so perfect. I ADORE them getting caught in bed at the end, and in particular Bodie just getting onto Doyle when the door flys open again hehehe Made me giggle, did that. But no, it's all just perfect.

I'm going to make a prediction now. All this stupendous brilliant writing will come to a sudden and abrupt end, let me see, round about the 2nd Jan!!! LOL Do you need more icons instead?!?!?

Brilliant, a definite keeper!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hee - I'm so glad you liked it, and thank you for saying so! (And I kinda liked the bit where they got caught too, I can so picture Bodie's face... *g*) As for the 2nd - silly girl! 't will be brill, of course, Prosfic is! *g*!

[gilda-elise.livejournal.com]

Absolutely loved this! You're fast becoming one of my favorite Pros writers. :-) It made so much more sense that Bodie and Doyle took off after the Operation Susie, rather than blithely return to the fold. In many ways, I'd hope that they wouldn't return but that's another story isn't it? Not that I'm hinting or anything. ;-)

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Thank you! So much! What a lovely thing to be told *g* I must admit to being kind of torn myself about whether they return - on the one hand they do love what they do, and believe in it, right? But on the other hand - oh George, how could you... not again? How much can our lads take..? As for the other story... well, who knows, but now you've all got me thinking, which is more than I was before... *g*

[golligirl4-5.livejournal.com]

Excellent story and I can definitely see why they would have this reaction to Cowley's action during the Operation Susie.

I have a feeling that never looked upon Cowley exactly the same way again and a good thing too since they can truly only trust each other.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Thank you *g* It must be so hard to be in their situation... nowadays of course they'd be counselled to death for every little thing, but that hadn't all taken off yet back then, so it was just them, wasn't it... And I must admit I never looked quite the same way at Cowley once I'd seen that ep... I mean, surely you can only take so much!

[paris7am.livejournal.com]

Sometimes it just feels impossible to comment - when something is just too beautiful and perfect and moves you *so* much, how is it possible to find words to express all of it? This story is one of those occasions.

Right now I'm taking the easy path of commenting on things which I can type about without the tears welling up...

It struck me that this one is very very reminiscent of the post Christmas story - the fleeing into Egypt part, trying to avoid slaughter, off into hiding. Also, so many parts ring with a cadence or rhythm of litany or liturgy - or it does so for me.

I find it so encouraging to see that in the midst of this exile, this bleak winter, we discover that they will always be alright - they've had to leave behind their community, their friends, but there will be more friends, new community around them, wherever they end up. Loyal friends, friends who will care for them. It makes the little references to all they've lost, like "Susan's trips" for example, less biting.

I don't know how you managed it, but it's wondrous how you've balanced their feelings for each other - there, but not there - connected but not - complete, but only to a point. Then taking it all the way. Beautiful. The shaving ritual will remain one of my favourites of all time - so erotic and so spiritual, just perfect.

There are a *lot* of pieces which I want to quote - one of those stories where it feels impossible to pull out favourite bits because it would end up being most of the story... But, here's me trying to keep it to a manageable amount!

No retort, no insult, no sarcastic jab about his modesty. Just… a kind of comfortable pull between them, the same feeling that kept them together on a job, that meant they each knew where the other was, what the other was doing, was going to do. For a while Bodie’d thought they were losing it, would lose it, but it was still there. They worked well together.

echoed, completed later with this one

Bodie’s eyes widened almost imperceptibly, and he still didn’t say anything, but Doyle knew it was okay. They always knew which way the other would break, and they knew now too. Maybe they’d even known before, had just lacked the guts to actually do anything about it, to make this move that would change everything once and forever.

Simply wonderful. Thank you for this amazing story. And I'll join in the crew who are petitioning for more of this universe!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Gosh, and sometimes it feels ever so hard to do justice to the things that people say! A simple "thank you" isn't even close to adequate! It's so nice to hear what you liked about it, what you saw in it - I wish I could nod confidently and say "yes, the flight to Egypt is just what I was going for" but I have to admit to being a total pagan at heart! I love that you saw that though, and it makes me think about the whole... oh, the world experience, how we're all so tied together, how we see things so differently, and yet at the heart of it is something so human... Oh, I know, call me an anthropologist... If you're very unlucky I shall start talking about red ochre... *g* But then human is just what our lads are, aren't they... It's what I love about them, anyway...

Okay, I suspect I'm heading off into ramble mode here, so I shall stop and just say thank you again - and I really am glad that you liked it!

[blackmushroom.livejournal.com]

What a wonderful story! I love this, beautiful, soooooo real.
I started reading as a "missing scene" story of a disturbing and very interesting episode: escape, fear, hesitation, nervous (sexual?) tension... Perfect. And then, very slowly, delicately, your story became so truthful, so right; a completely new universe.
Beautifully written. Many lovely moments, already commented. (*Doyle’s shout was a thing of beauty and a thing of danger* Oh please... these words are Poetry. I don't know why but this line is... is Ray Doyle!)
Thank you very much for this.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Thank you for telling me that you liked it! And I think that was how I saw it when I first started writing, as the missing scene, as what came next - because surely there would be something more than just getting up the next morning and going back to work as usual? And then, of course, the lads just took over... *g*

[londonronnie.livejournal.com]

You already know just how much I love this story - and after a second reading I think I love it even more!

It's the whole 'Bodie and Doyle against Cowley, CI5 and the world' thing that gets me. And you've captured it all so fantastically well, with great dialogue, believable OCs and a lovely blend of tension and humour.

As to msmoat's plea for more in this universe, I can only say "hear hear!". A second visit (or third...or fourth...) would be wonderful. Pretty please?

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Oh, but they so are them against the whole world - cos it's them, right? I've been reading Larton all day, and I'm so in love with them right now... *g* Thank you so much for reading again, and for your help the first time too! As for the wheedling (*tries to look stern*)... well, maybe... *g*

[diegina.livejournal.com]

Wonderful story, there's just one wrong thing with it: where's the end? I mean the real end, not this open "He's coming." :-)

Sequel! Sequel! Sequel!

Pleeeeease...

*sad puppy eyes*

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hey! Stop with the sad puppy eyes! I hardly know you! Tell you what, you translate that B/D fic of yours for me, and I'll..? *g* (But really, glad you liked it and thank you for saying! Now... about that fic of yours... I keep eying it just in case it's magically turned into English, but so far no luck, you just taunt me with that B/D pairing tag...)

[eveningblue.livejournal.com]

Wow, what a lovely, lovely story. I am completely blown away.

Also, a great bit of timing for me, because I've just seen "Operation Susie" and been stung, on the lads' behalf, by Cowley's behavior, so nice to see another version of how they might have reacted.

I loved that the townspeople knew what was going on even before they did! And the echo of what had happened to Fiona's nephew and his lover years before.

Probably my favorite scene, if I had to pick one, was the morning of the first snow, and the almost-moment that eventually led to the actual moment of first touch and kiss.

"Nearly as good as bullets,"--loved that. I got a real sense of how much they hated Cowley for what he'd done.

I had this terrible feeling that they were going to die at the end and I was preparing myself for that, so it was nice that they finally had a happy ending, or as happy as could be expected. Like others, I wished they could have stayed there forever, but I suppose that's not realistic.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

*runs to pick up all the bits of you, sticks you back together... eyes the missing bits... it was windy...*

*g* Thank you! Know what you mean about the ending too, could you tell that I was torn and wanted them to stay there as well? But on the other hand, that's what I like about Pros, it is relatively realistic... Okay, I said relatively *g*

And hee - I saw your post just before I put the fic up actually, but I was very good and restrained myself from saying anything at all, due to the above!

[metabolick.livejournal.com]

Besides everything that others have mentioned, I love the premise that Ray has a bolt hole of his own (albeit purchased sight unseen). The snowman turning into Cowley and the Lads taking out their anger on it is a nice touch. And I squeed with delight at the mention of Ray listening to the northern lights, something we had discussed on your LJ previously! :-D Finally, I selfishly love the fact that your stories are getting longer! Thanks for a lovely read and the prospect of re-reads to come.

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

*g* Thank you for such lovely comments! I actually wrote that scene before we had our chat (hmmn, I think...) but I was thinking of you whenever I re-read it afterwards! And yeah, it used to be I could write 1000 words and call myself done, but now... *sighs... kinda happily* I guess the lads just get you like that, eh?

[crimson-37.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, I have finally got to read this at last. And I love it.

I love the way you have our lads escaping from a CI5 that they no longer have faith in, and the way you keep to the fact that these are highly trained agents who have that training engrained into them. Not allowing them to relax 100% knowing they were up against Cowley, and therefore needing to remain on their guard.

I love the way you, bring them together. It was done so naturally and that I love. Ray stadling Bodie's thighs while shaving him. *mmm..* I can see Bodie's soft eyes watching the gentle concentration on the beguilig face.
And then to have Bodie...
Bodie stopped him with a hand to his waist. Bodie’d never put a hand on his waist before
*sighs*
And it would stop him, feeling the strength in that large hand as it lays surprisingly gentle and far more intimatly against his side, than any touch he has received throughout their partnership. I can feel the electricity running through and between them as he freezes and their eyes are locked, in a look that neither would be able to pull away from even if they had wanted to. And then the kiss.
Perfect! So bleeding perfect, I nearly cried.

And I loved your OCs, they really brought that little village alive.

You know I love the way you write these two anyway, but dear, you have surpassed yourself once again.

And I thank you.

Like the others I call for an encore. I mean really, you don't expect us to let you stop there, do you? ;)Not when there is so much more of this universe to explore.

Thanks so much for sharing this with us, honey!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hee - I'm so glad you liked it! I have to admit I rather liked the idea of Ray straddling Bodie's thighs meself... *g* As for the universe... well, actually, the more I think about it... *g*

[(Anonymous)]

Everyone above has summed up this story perfectly! This was a lovely read and such a treat when on opening the link I saw the little scroll bar to the right get smaller and smaller indicating a long story from you, just what I wanted for Christmas!

You have such a lovely eye for details and practicalities – ‘The trivet, a pair of firedogs, and assorted ancient pokers’ – all these things make your fic so believable, ground it in realism, as a reader I so appreciate all your research!

Words sparkle, like about the pints – ‘decently drawn and darkly promising’.

And – ‘he passed his gaze down the hillocks and hollows that were the rest of Doyle’

It’s an art form to get words so visual, you do this so well.

Also humorous – ‘“Deign to sit? It’s getting you on your feet that’s the problem,” Doyle retorted, and Bodie acknowledged a fair hit with a nod of his head and a smirk.’

And another fave: ‘But Bodie grinned back as he spoke, purely because he couldn’t help it, there was no resisting Doyle in this soft mood.

“Sod off.” Doyle turned back to the window, gazed some more.’

I like the contrast between ‘Doyle in this soft mood’ and then Doyle’s first words after that!

Great storyline and characters as well, I echo those above and hope you revisit that village!

MB x

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hee - definitely my longest so far! They do seem to be getting longer and longer, but then of course they take longer to write too... But it's fun, and I'm not at all getting bored with them yet, which I thought I might... I mean, how many different ways can they have first time? Actually, it turns out, lots... *g*

‘The trivet, a pair of firedogs, and assorted ancient pokers’ – all these things make your fic so believable, ground it in realism, as a reader I so appreciate all your research
I'd love to say yes, thank you, spent much time on research... but in this case the details are mostly due simply to leading a so-far longish and cluttered life... *g* And having to set that bloody fire every morning when we first moved to the Isle of Man... grrr...

Glad you liked it hon, thank you!

[andreathelion.livejournal.com]

I should be working, instead I'm reading and been totally blown away, you always capture the lads so perfectly.
I just could start to read it again (might do it as well *g*)
Thank you for sharing this gem :)

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

*looks stern* Go back to work!

Or, you know, read fic. *g*

Thank you, I'm really glad you liked it!

[izzie7.livejournal.com]

I saved this one to read when I had more time, and I am so glad I did, even though it makes it almost impossible now to comment since everyone else has already said all the things I want to say too!

It was so right that they would have to get away for a bit, to try to recover some sense of why they continue to do what they do, to try to come to the terms with the fact that they allowed Cowley to do this to them, and the pacing of this story is perfect. I loved their first full day at the croft, & how they were oblivious to the fact that the entire village knew they were there - very realistic. You created a terrific sense of atmosphere, and you have a beautiful, understated way of describing their relationship developing - like the way Doyle moves the sleeping Bodie's clothes to warm by the fire on the day the snow comes.

Absolutely loved the eureka moment:

Bodie’s eyes widened almost imperceptibly, and he still didn’t say anything, but Doyle knew it was okay. They always knew which way the other would break, and they knew now too. Maybe they’d even known before, had just lacked the guts to actually do anything about it, to make this move that would change everything once and forever.

and Bodie as Doyle's phantom-self - what a lovely, perfect image.

Oh, & this was great - made me giggle:
“So who did all this then?” Bodie asked, bringing his hand up to brush hair away from Doyle’s forehead. “They follow you when you left?”

“Not unless they were disguised as snowflakes,” he said, and surprised an amused snort from Bodie.

This was just lovely, & I'm with the others who'd appreciate another visit :)

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

it makes it almost impossible now to comment
Well you did a wonderful job anyway! I'm so impressed with the amazing feedback people are giving at discoveredinalj, it's brilliant...

So thank you for the lovely comments, I'm really glad you liked it! It was actually really nice to write, so I might just be tempted to send 'em back up... *g*

[moth2fic.livejournal.com]

How do you do it? Is it something in the snow out there? Is that why I could feel the cold and smell the peat? Brilliant, as usual, and a real treat for the post Christmas period. Thank you!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Hee! Too much time spent on the Isle of Man, of all places, perhaps... and various other tiny, tiny worlds... even in Scotland... *g* But thank you - I'm so glad you liked it!

[solosundance.livejournal.com]

Brig-a-bloody-doon, mate! Not a v. sensible comment, but within it lies all my admiration, appreciation and delight at a top-drawer prosfic. Ta!

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Lol - all comments welcome, especially ones that make me giggle! Thank you for stopping by, I'm glad you liked it!

[przed.livejournal.com]

I've been mulling over what to say about this wonderful story that hasn't already been said. Because it is so wonderful. I love the village setting you've created and the way Bodie and Doyle weave their way into the fabric of village life. I love the way you've given them the leisure for their relationship to develop. And I love the final resolution, and the clear love between them that can survive everything.

This will definitely be a story I come back to often.

[ancastar.livejournal.com]

Okay, funny story--

So we're obviously reading together tonight, exchanging little notes back and forth, and I'm absorbed in your story, in the way you can create such a complete universe and an utterly compelling plot and the way you make the guys guys, while still allowing them to be tender with each other.

And everything is going along beautifully. Then, Ray's car rolls off the road and I think, 'Goody, hurt/comfort. My favorite!' (Because I have the emotional maturity of a seven year old.) And then, the story jumps to B & D being barged in on by the town folk. And I think, 'Wow. That's so unlike her. She doesn't normally leave out the juicy bits.'

So, I ponder what to do here. I tend to write you fawning notes of adoration about your writing because...well...I adore it and, frankly, am not too proud to fawn. But I'm always honest in my comments. And this time, I think I need to give you some constructive criticism (Like: 'Hey, the seven year old trapped inside me really wants to see poor wounded Ray comforted by overprotective Bodie'.)

But I worry. Because I don't want to offend you and I think the world of you as a writer.

So I decide to read other comments, to see if anyone else, per chance, mentioned anything.

No one did.

So I think, 'Maybe I just need to go back and read it again. Maybe it flows better than I think it does.'

So I do.

Which is when I realize the text file stored in Pros Lit is missing a significant section of your story. :-)

You gave the part of my soul that yearns for hurt/comfort all its little immature self could hope for. The story is lovely and complete, and is everything everyone else has said it is. I've so very, very happy that I've read it twice.

Though you may want to see about getting that file fixed. ;-)

Thanks!

Correction!

[ancastar.livejournal.com]

Sorry. I read the file stored on Pros Lib. What a difference a letter makes.

[(Anonymous)]

I was reading another story tonight but my mind kept slipping back to your story I'd read a few nights ago. So I read Never the Words They Say again. Of the many lovely stories I've read this winter this one has completely bowled me over. There's not one single scene I can say is my favourite. They all share a special place - the long trek, finding the cold Croft, making it *home*, the snowball fight, the snowman, the brilliant village characters I came to love, finding the old newspaper, the shaving scene, their first time, their fear and misgivings, Doyle's trek to and from the pub, Bodie's protectiveness, *Doyle's* protectiveness, meeting Cowley... I know there are scenes I've missed. This is a Keeper and I know I'll read it again and again. I almost hated Cowley for his intrusion. I wanted the Croft to go on forever. Gorgeous writing.

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I was reading another story tonight but my mind kept slipping back to your story I'd read a few nights ago. So I read Never the Words They Say again. Of the many lovely stories I've read this winter this one has completely bowled me over. There's not one single scene I can say is my favourite. They all share a special place - the long trek, finding the cold Croft, making it *home*, the snowball fight, the snowman, the brilliant village characters I came to love, finding the old newspaper, the shaving scene, their first time, their fear and misgivings, Doyle's trek to and from the pub, Bodie's protectiveness, *Doyle's* protectiveness, meeting Cowley... I know there are scenes I've missed. This is a Keeper and I know I'll read it again and again. I almost hated Cowley for his intrusion. I wanted the Croft to go on forever. Gorgeous writing.
<Signed: MaDonna>

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for coming all the way over here to tell me this! I'm honestly sitting here with this huge grin on my face... I hope you get this somehow, though I'm not sure if you will or not! I was going to reply to you on the list, but your message seems to have vanished... I was a bit shy of writing to the list to say thank you, cos I'm not sure that it's that sort of place, but people have been so nice that I really have to. The mods can yell at me if I get it wrong, I guess... *g*

I've got to admit that I really enjoyed writing this story - well, I usually do love writing the lads *g* - and I'm just chuffed to bits that other people like it so much too. And it hadn't really occured to me to write a sequel or anything like that - the story was the story, I thought - now people have got me thinking, and really I want to know more about Jimmy, cos he was a surly sod even as I wrote him then... So... I'm thinking we might all go back one day... *g*

Again - thank you so much for taking the time to come over here!