Drabble Challenge - "Fences"

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Title: Fences
Author: bistokids
Slash or Gen: Slash
Word Count: 100
Archive at ProsLib/Circuit: Yes please
Author's Name for Archiving (if different to above): Bistokids
Disclaimer: Do I have to? Oh OK, they're not mine.
Notes: Written for the April Drabble Challenge - my prompt was 'fences'


People had said Bodie put up walls.

He didn’t really. Fences, more than walls. Partitions, keeping everything safely separate.

Childhood. Well, OK, that one was a wall.

Travelling. Fence between that and ‘mercenary’, so he could remember the thrill of one without the taint of the other.

Army. Northern Ireland. SAS. All nicely fenced in. Not forgotten, not blanked out, just safely separate.

CI5. Doyle.

Doyle, barging past carefully deflective phrases with shattering precision. No respecter of privacy. Scornful of secrets. Doyle, who reached out, dragged down the fences, let everything bleed together.

And yet, with Doyle, it didn’t hurt.

Comments

[schnuffi.livejournal.com]

Doyle, who reached out, dragged down the fences, let everything bleed together.

And yet, with Doyle, it didn’t hurt.

That really says it all, doesn't it? Wonderful little drabble *sigh*

Oh and Happy Birthday!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :D And thanks for the birthday wishes too. (Glorious icon, as well)

[ancastar.livejournal.com]

Oh! I really like that. Drabbles are trickier than they look because they need to feel complete, and the reader should feel like they've learned something. I think you accomplished both objectives here with precision and grace. Thank you!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Precision and grace - yay! Thanks! I had in mind the 'instructions' about how a drabble should be a story in itself - and I really enjoy the mathematical aspect of this form of writing.

I'm delighted you liked it. :D

[londonronnie.livejournal.com]

That's very thought-provoking. I like it a lot.

And a Happy Birthday from me too!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :D Glad you liked it, and that it got you thinking.

[andreathelion.livejournal.com]

Very well written, thank you!

And Happy Birthday to you :)

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I'm very pleased you think so! (And thanks for the Happy Birthday - it's been a good one!)

[callistosh65.livejournal.com]

Beautifully done. Such poetry and precision on 100 words. Great imagery in Doyle/fences and what he does to them.

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Mention of poetry makes me particularly happy - there are so many people on this comm with a decidedly poetic way with words, and this is about as close as I get to proper poetry! Glad you enjoyed it. :D

[draycevixen.livejournal.com]

Oddly sweet for a drabble with words and phrases like "mercenary," "Northern Ireland" and the "SAS."

Thank you!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

That's the paradox of Bodie, though, isn't it? 'Oddly sweet' describes him quite well!

Thanks - glad you liked it. :D

[draycevixen.livejournal.com]

Yes! He does have those odd moments of glee, like a (heavily armed) ten year old boy (who knows how to kill you with a spoon). :D

[sc-fossil.livejournal.com]

this was great! really liked the idea of the fences keeping things separate until Doyle blunders in. *g*

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thanks! It's occurred to me before that, for someone like Bodie, the only efficient way to deal with all his experiences would be some serious compartmentalisation (which is maybe why he responds so badly when bits of his past come calling). The 'fences' prompt kind of crystallised things. Glad it worked for you. :)

[ankaree.livejournal.com]

Really like this a lot! I love that Doyle is the only one to break through all Bodie's fences.

Doyle, barging past carefully deflective phrases with shattering precision. No respecter of privacy. Scornful of secrets. Doyle, who reached out, dragged down the fences, let everything bleed together.

Just perfect! Thanks!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :D

I love that Doyle is the only one to break through all Bodie's fences.

Me too - I love the bond between them, and the fact that nobody else can share it.

[probodie.livejournal.com]

Oh those old fences are in evidence except when Doyle's around. Great drabble.

[probodie.livejournal.com]

Happy Birthday, btw. *g*

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thank you! What a fab icon! :DD (and glad you liked the drabble, obviously!)

[byslantedlight.livejournal.com]

Doyle, barging past carefully deflective phrases with shattering precision.
Ooh, I liked this bit - many parts of Doyle in just those few words... Yeah, thought-provoking stuff, thank you!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thank you - *bows to excellent prompt* :D

[kiwisue.livejournal.com]

Very, very good. Great phrases - and I saw your reply to sc_fossil above, about how Bodie might compartmentalise his life, and it's a great concept!

Doyle, barging past carefully deflective phrases with shattering precision. No respecter of privacy. Scornful of secrets. Doyle, who reached out, dragged down the fences, let everything bleed together.

And yet, with Doyle, it didn’t hurt.

Great insight.

And Happy Birthday, too!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thank you. :D

I saw your reply to sc_fossil above, about how Bodie might compartmentalise his life, and it's a great concept!

Thanks again. Ccertainly explains a few things, for me anyway.

[firlefanzine.livejournal.com]

A late Happy Birthday!

"Fences" - a perfect match for Bodie. And you describe it very good!

"I really enjoy the mathematical aspect of this form of writing" Really? I've never done a drabble. Isn't it rather a straitjacket?

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

A late Happy Birthday!

I intend to keep my birthday going for as long as possible (in RL anyway), so you're right on time! XD

Isn't it rather a straitjacket?
It is really - and I certainly wouldn't want to write drabbles all the time. But I do enjoy the precision, where every word has to be carefully chosen - there's no room for wordiness or self-indulgence (unlike in this comment, apparently!)

For me, drabbles fall into the area where maths meets art - you get your concept and write about it, but then there's this extra part where you're trying to replace a 5-word phrase with a 4-word phrase, are you losing or gaining meaning, taking out unnecessary words and replacing them with the perfect 'mot juste' (or that's what's happening in theory!)

I can imagine, for some writers, it would be a tortuously unenjoyable process. Me, I quite like it! :)

[shooting2kill.livejournal.com]

I thought you managed to get a lot of interesting ideas into a very short space - ideas which made me think... *and* at the same time you managed to provide an insight into Bodie's personality and history. I enjoyed this, thanks!

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Glad you enjoyed it - thanks. :) Bodie's background fascinates me.

[hambelandjemima.livejournal.com]

And when you said CI5. Doyle. we just knew he'd have to be different.

Doyle, who reached out, dragged down the fences, let everything bleed together.

And yet, with Doyle, it didn’t hurt.

Gorgeous. It describes their relationship perfectly. ♥

[bistokids.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :D Yep, Doyle's a whole different story.

[birggitt.livejournal.com]

And yet, with Doyle, it didn’t hurt.
You put it in such a lovely way... this' exactly who they are, how they are.
The fences hasn't fallen, thought. They only become larger, as now they contain both of them =D